Why are women so hard to understand? The 8 Big Differences Between Men’s and Women’s Brains

by Alex Matlock

Most men always believe that understanding women is impossible. What men really need to understand is that we are totally different and, instead of giving up, we should try to embrace the differences and accept women for what they really are, nothing like us. Only then we can use all of this knowledge to our advantage. The following article illustrates the differences between the sexes and explains how we can use these to our advantage.

Modern science has allowed us to study the male and female brains and come up with conclusions as to why we are so different. This is mainly down to how our brains are structured, and that’s what this article is about. It will not teach you how to pick up women but it will show you why we are so different, and as soon as you can get this around your head and accept women for what they really are, then it will become much easier to succeed with them.

Human Relationships:  Women communicate much better than men, they focus on how to create a solution that works for the entire group, talking trough issues, and utilizes non-verbal cues such as tone, emotion, and empathy. Men on the other hand, tend to be more task-oriented, less talkative, and more isolated. Men have a hard time understanding emotions that are not spoken, while women tend to intuit emotions and emotional cues. These differences clearly explain why men and women sometimes have difficulty in communication and why men-to-men friendships look different from friendships among women.

What does this mean? If you ever spoke to a woman, got deep into a subject and felt like you spoke a totally different language well, this is the reason. In your step to understanding women this is the first thing you need to get down, THEY ARE DIFFERENT. They are so different in fact that sometimes we can’t even communicate but, if you can be more in control of your emotions (and I know, no man wants to be in control of his emotions) they will not so much believe that you understand them, but feel it. Now I’m not telling you to cry for hours after you watch “The Notebook” however, I am telling you that being in tune with your emotions results in you being able to communicate with her at a different level, a level that most men do not get to.

Left brain vs. both hemispheres: Experts have proven that men process better in the left hemisphere while women tend to process equally well between the two hemispheres. This difference clearly shows why men are stronger with left-brain activities and approach problem-solving from a task-oriented perspective while women typically solve problems more creatively and are more aware of feelings while communicating.

What does this mean? Well think about it for a second…any problem that you had, you always tough about it this way: “I need to get this done first, then this other thing, then this, and then they all fit into place and get’s this done”. Does that sound familiar? It should if you’re a normal man. With women however, things are totally different and proves why men are better in some jobs (business, programming) and women in others (teaching, caretaking). This is another prime example that will get you closer to accepting just how different women’s minds are.

Mathematical Abilities: An area in the brain called the inferior-parietal lobule (IPL) is typically significantly larger in men, especially on the left side, than in women. This is the section responsible with mathematical ability, and probably explains why men perform higher in mathematical tasks than do women. What’s even more interesting is that this area of the brain that was abnormally large in Einstein. The IPL also processes sensory information, and the larger right side in women allows them to focus on, “specific stimuli, such as baby crying in the night”.

Reaction to stress: In stress situation men have a response reaction that resembles “fight or flight” while women react with a “tend and befriend” strategy. Psychologist Shelly E. Taylor first came up with the phrase “tend an befriend” after noticing that during times of stress women tend to take care of themselves and their children (tending) and form strong group bonds (befriending). The reason behind these different reactions to stress is down to hormones. When someone is under stress the hormone oxytocin is released into the body. In men, testosterone reduces the effects of oxytocin as it is produced in high volumes during stress; this explains the reason for the “fight or flight” response. In women, estrogen amplifies the effects of oxytocin resulting in calming and nurturing feelings.

Language: The two sections in the brain which are responsible for language have been found to be significantly larger in women than in men, indicating one reason why women typically excel in language-based subjects and in language-associated thinking. It’s also important to mention that men typically process language in one hemisphere whilst women process it in both. This differences offers a bit of protection on case of a stroke, as women may be able to recover fully from a stroke affecting the language areas in the brain while men may not have this same advantage.

What does this mean? Well it clearly means that women are much better with languages than us men, you must have noticed at least one woman that seems to pick up languages very easily. I can only add one thing here, which is probably unrelated but if you can speak more than one language, make sure you use that in your conversations with women; it will be a plus to your end game. I speak 2 languages fluently and know basic words in about 5. I always mention that and, more importantly, if they have no idea what you’re saying; you can easily tell them that you are fluent in all of them. I know just a few words in German but I test her with them, if she doesn’t react, then surely she has no idea what I’m saying…then I can repeat the 2 words tell her what I said and also convince her that I’m fluent. They love this stuff.

Emotions: The most obvious difference is probably the emotions. Women have a larger deep limbic system than men, it allows them o be more in touch with their feelings and better able to express themselves, which promotes bonding with others. This is one of the reasons why women serve as caregivers for children. Sadly this comes with a downside as this larger deep limbic system also opens women up to depression, especially during times of hormonal shifts such as after childbirth or during a woman’s menstrual cycle.

What does this mean? Remember that time when this girl you were talking to, was looking at the other girl, you noticed, and believed that they were talking behind your back? Well they weren’t talking, they just look at each other and communicate…It amazes me sometimes how I have absolutely no idea what’s going on. Anyway this is probably the most important difference and if understood can change the way you interact with women.

Let’s put it this way: women are in tune with their feelings – they are less in tune with their rational minds – so if you the man can make them feel good, all other things bare less importance. This is why when people tell you that looks don’t matter you should believe them. Don’t get me wrong, they do matter in some cases but, most of the time it all bows down to how you make them feel. If you understand that making them feel good is what you should be doing (not impressing them with money, looks, muscles or anything else) then you will have no trouble getting them into bed.

Brain Size: Typically, men’s brains are 11-12% bigger than women’s brains. Sadly, this difference in size has absolutely nothing to do with intelligence, but does explain the difference in size between men and women. Men need a bigger brain to control their bigger bodies and muscles.

Pain: Men and women perceive pain differently. Studies have shown that women need more morphine to reach the same level of pain reduction. They have also shown that woman vocalize their pain and seek treatment much quicker than men. During pain, an area of the brain called the amygdala is activated. Research has shown that in men the right amygdala (controls external functions) is activated and in women the left amygdala (controls internal functions) is activated. This is the reason women seem to perceive pain more intensely than men.

 

So what can we draw from this article? Most importantly the fact that men and women are completely different, but do you know the fun part? We can’t live without each other!

What can we men do with this sort of information? Women like a man that understands them, although you can’t understand exactly what she’s thinking, you can still understand that she is different and the moment you accept her as that and respect her for it, she will see that you are different…she will feel good about you, she will believe that “this guy understands me” not like the other men… and that is where your success begins.

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{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

Edmundo Greenway

Hello there, You’ve done an excellent job. I will definitely digg it and personally recommend to my friends. I am sure they will be benefited from this website.

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Dubrey

Fantastic info and interestingly written. Keep up the superb stuff!

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Choc

If you’re reading this, you’re all set, partner!

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Garfield Presson

Thanks for sharing, this is a fantastic site.

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Dudley Dooright

Very interesting article. As a pilot and pilot instructor, it’s very interesting to observe women pilots and women student pilots. They tend to be very good at radio communications. Not so good at dealing with maps and navigation, and often quite weak at the in-your-head math so common in the cockpit. As to emotion, we simulate problems and emergencies in the simulator flights. Men will keep doing their best; but i’ve seen women get emotional and throw up their hands and give up.

Another interesting thing I’ve seen repeatedly at shooting ranges is that women have better hand-eye coordination and fine muscle control than men. Women pick up pistol shooting faster and better than men, especially when taught by a woman who is sympathetic to the anti-gun brainwashing pushed at women.

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Alex Matlock

Fantastic observations. I too have noticed that women find it a lot harder to navigate and read maps. This may also be a reason why there’s not that many women cab/bus drives as opposed to men.

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Tyler

I like this website very much, there’s a lot of fantastic information. Keep it up!

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alexander

Hello! You have done some real good work on the subject of women. I am thankful that your sharing this with all of us. Thanks Alex.

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tochukwu

good write up

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